You don't. I mean this in the nicest manner possible. You can't quickly "get over" a breakup, especially a long term one. I think after two of these devastating events I'm pretty advanced on the topic though, so I figured I might as well try to give SOME tips, if I have any at all. I haven't exactly prewritten this post and I'm kind of totally winging it, nothing new, right?
- Live your life. Seriously. I know it's going to be hard but, I mean, what have you left to loose? Maybe that's pessimistic optimism, I don't know. You're the only person who can live your own life though so don't rely on others.
- Focus on you. In the end you're all that matters. Yes; the person you loved very much walked out and changed on you. That doesn't mean it's the end of the world even though it probably feels like it.
- Preoccupy your time. Spend plenty of time with friends and family, try not to have much if any free time. Time to sit, is time to ponder. Nothing good comes from dwelling on old memories and all thoughts.
- Learn from your mistakes. Look back, what caused your break up? Was it you or them? Try to figure things out honestly before pointing blame. Take this as an opportunity to learn from your mistakes.
- Don't deny it. I know it's a common coping method, but honestly denying your pain is only going to cause more pain in the long run. Accept fate, accept what happened and try to make the outcome more positive rather than negative.
- Think of the bad times. Remember when your partner stole your hat and didn't give it back for months, without your approval? Or when they burped in your face and laughed about it on your first date? Try to remember all the negative things, even though your mind will want to keep reliving the happy moments. If you broke up, there's surely more negative times to keep your mind on.
- Be thankful. Fate says you didn't belong with that person, be thankful you didn't waste even more time with them.
- Remove anything that triggers painful memories. I'm not telling you to throw away every gift they ever gave you, just hide them somewhere you won't accidentally find them. I know, I had a Build-A-Bear from my ex and when you pressed it's paw his voice said, "I love you". I used to ALWAYS stumble on it or accidentally lay on it and the voice through me into memories and endless tears. You DON'T want this!
- Remember; crying is okay. It's okay to cry if you just lost a very important person in your life. It isn't okay to sit in your room all day moping and sobbing endless though.
I know I'm certainly not an expert, and this post is very terribly written, but I figured maybe I could at least help one person. That's all that matters.
